Bryan T. (Archie) Archibald

I met Bryan on a blind date and it didn't take me long to realize the date

might be blind but I wasn't. He was the one for me. I was a freshman in

college and was home for the week -end and a friend called and wanted

me to go with two other couples and Bryan. We dated for a year and a

half before we decided to marry.

Our plans were to be married at my folks

house in January. Uncle Sam altered those plans for he was called into

service in October prior to our wedding plans. He finished his basic

training and was sent to California for his first assignment. His mom and

dad drove me out there and we were married by a Justice of the Peace in

San Bernadino, California.

We spent four years in the Air Force and

were transferred to all areas of the U.S. That was the beginning of our

life together. We had three children, David, Born July 24, 1955, Kim, Born

January 4, 1958, and Gregg Born December 9,1963. We worked to raise

our children and got them out on their own. David and his wife Suzanne

produced us our first two grandsons, Bryan and Brandon. Then Kim gave

us our first granddaughter, Shelby. Then Gregg gave us our third

grandson, Lars.

Bryan established a business which was unique in the fact that there were

not too many of its nature in the U.S. In 1986 we saw our dream come

true. It was a small acreage with a lots of woods and a lots of hard work.

We built our house, cut down trees, built our pond, built a barn, and fenced

a portion of the land. It was our dream come true. I sometimes called him

"my frustrated farmer". He enjoyed raising his goats, chickens, ducks,

and rabbits. He made pets out of each one of them. Living in the country

was a new and exciting adventure to me. Once when one of our ducks

was setting her eggs, they hatched out but the mama duck left one of the

eggs. We put the deserted egg in the gas oven, with just the heat from the

pilot light and watched it hatch out. What a joy it was to see this little wet

creature come out of the egg and start "peeping".

We didn't mind hard

work, but now we wanted to sell our business and retire. In January 1995

we actively pursued a buyer for our business, for Bryan would be 65 years

in May. We wanted to enjoy the fruits of our labor. That April he got to

feeling bad, not sick, just not his usual vivacious self. After several visits

to the doctor it was suggested that he go for blood test for the possibility of

cancer. This he did of May 14th and the test came back negative. We

breathed a sigh of relief.

At last, we had a buyer for our business and the outlook looked brighter

for his health. The date of the closing was July 27, 1995.......That was

the same day that he was diagnosed with bone cancer and a prognosis of

three to six months to live.

He lived one month and two days from

diagnosis to death. He was such an inspiration to each person that visited

him. He told me the day that he was diagnosed that this was an answer to

his prayers. That his dad died of a heart attack and he didn't have time to

say goodbye and that he had prayed since that time that God would give

him time to say goodbye to each one of his friends and loved ones, which

he did. We were able to go home for the last two weeks of his life with the

aid of Hospice.

We spent much time talking about our years of marriage, and we had our

share of fusses and differences during that forty four years, but there was

never a time when we didn't love each other. He was so concerned about

me staying in the country alone. He asked me to sell our "Dream Home"

but I told him that if that time came the Lord would let me know. Little

did I realize how true that statement was. Nine months after his death we

had a strong wind that blew the mailbox off the stand. I stood there and

looked at it laying in the yard and cried. I don't have anyone to fix it for

me. Okay, I can do that!!! I did, but then the pasture needed mowing and

I got out on my John Deere riding mower and tried to mow it and got

stuck. So many things happened that I realized I would have to give up

and move to town. Eleven months to the day of his death I closed the deal

on the sale of our "Dream".

We talked about his death. I asked him if he was afraid, and he said yes,

but maybe more apprehensive than afraid. He asked me not to keep

anyone out from seeing him for he had a lots of friends and relatives.

Even though I selfishly I wanted all the time with him myself I abided by

his wishes. Sunday night August 27th his brother was out to visit. Gordon

and I went into the living room to chat.

Gordon told me that he and his wife had planned a trip which was two

weeks away but it all depends on how Bryan is. I replied, "Gordon, Bryan

will not be here next week." I DID NOT say that, no that is not true were

my thoughts. Bryan was not complaining with pain, however he was on

the morphine pump he would not use it. Monday morning the attendant

came in, he was hired from 9 a.m. till 5 p.m.

The first thing I wanted him to do was change Bryan's sheets. The

attendant was being so careful not to hurt him, and told him so. Bryan

said "Morris, don't sweat the little things" Just a very few minutes later I

was standing at the foot of his bed and he looked at me and said "Mama,

mama, I knew that he never called me that. Hospice had given me some

information to read, and in that was that the patient might see someone of

their family that had preceded them in death. It was his mama, I'm sure

that he saw.

At five-fifteen I asked Morris if it was not time for him to

leave. He said he was going home and shower and shave and he would be

back in about two hours. This is strange!!! Still my heart was denying

that this was happening. He started slipping into a coma. I sat there by

his bed and sang "Take his hand precious Lord and lead him home, over

and over. When the attendant came back he sat me down and wanted to

know all the people that should be notified. "why, I am thinking, he isn't

going to die" my heart could not stand that. About two hours later the

attendant called for the nurse to come to our house. By this time the

cancer had reached his nervous system and he was convulsing terribly.

The nurse on one side, me on the other, and the attendant at the foot of

the bed holding him on the bed. Then it hit me BAMMMM, it is real he is

DYING. I rubbed his head and told him to turn loose that everything

would be okay. He settled down then the nurse told me to go rest for a

while, for this could take hours.

I went into the other bedroom laid down on the bed and prayed "Dear

God, please take his hand and lead him home." Then I went to sleep....I

know that it was only the will of God that I was able to sleep. One hour

later I was awakened by "Gladys I think it is about time". I felt so guilty

about going to sleep for I had promised him I would stay with him while

he was dying.....

When I got into the room he was as ashen as death and as

cold as death. I laid my hand on his arm and walked from the room.

GUILTY, GUILTY, until I finally realized that God had answered my

prayer in one hour and twenty minutes, not hours.

I now believe that I was with him when he died, but his heart had not fully

quit beating. If not, why was he so ashen, and why was he so cold? He

died at 4:15 Tuesday morning August 29, 1995. When his spirit left his

body there was an angel of the Lord to take him home.

I will always be grateful to the Hospice Team for the time we had together

at home, to express our love, and our thoughts. This could not have been

easy to do in a hospital. The Hospice team was there for support for me

and my family, and are still faithful to us.

IN LOVING MEMORY OF:

BRYAN T. (Archie) ARCHIBALD

SHOULD YOU GO FIRST

Should you go first and I remain to walk this road alone.

I'll live in memory's garden dear, With happy days we've known

In spring I'll wait for roses red. When fades the lilac blue

In early fall when brown leaves fall, I'll catch a glimpse of you.

Should you for first and I remain. For the battles to be fought

Each thing you've touched along the way. Will be a hallowed spot!

I'll hear your voice, I'll see your smile, Though blindly I may grope.

The memory of your helping hand Will buoy me with hope.

Should you go first and I remain To finish out the scroll,

No lengthening shadow shall creep in To make this life seem droll.

We've known so much happiness, We've had our cup of joy.

And memory is one gift of God That death cannot destroy.

Should you go first and I remain, One thing I'd have you do:

Walk slowly down the path of death For soon I'll follow you.

I'll want to know each step you take That I may walk the same

For some day down that lonely road, You'll hear me call your name.

(Taken from the Congressional Record, June 9, 1941)

I am still missing you.

Love, Gladys